Guest Blog: Another Type of Homesick
When I first arrived in the UK as a fresher I lived in student accommodation.
It was the first time I had lived by myself and not with my family.
I still remember the moment I walked into my room in Edinburgh; fresh and excited! I couldn’t wait to start living alone and to freely decide what to do in my spare time, without the need to ask for my parents’ permission (well, I do come from an Asian family!). I was so thrilled to be making decisions about my life independently!
I still remember video-calling my mother after doing my first shop at Poundland and Tesco. I proudly and happily told her what I had bought for food and for cleaning my room! But when she was smiling at me and praising me for my independence, I wanted to cry.
I wanted to cry because…
I realised that I could live well without my parents.
I realised that one day I would need to live without my parents.
I realised that death would one day separate me from them.
I was not near them.
I felt guilty.
But I did not show or express these feelings. Worrying my parents was the last thing I wanted to do while abroad.
I’ve never had the awareness of the transience of life come this close to me. I never expected this to happen during my time studying abroad. It was real and frightening.
Parents will pass away, and one day we will need to live without them.
Even now, after I have lived in the UK for more than 5 years, I still have these feelings from time to time. However, because of this experience, I have learnt to cherish every moment spent with my family, on the phone or in person. It has taught me to set my eyes on the everlasting God and His unfading love. Because of this experience I am having a better relationship with my family and with God!
I thank God because I am really grateful for this experience.
— Wing Li